Spring Cleaning

The impatience. The anxiousness. The restlessness. Every year, around this time, before Easter, I experience a turmoil of emotions. For some people this might occur before New Year's - a time to look back at the past year and come to grips with all the good, the bad, and the not-so-pretty occurrences in life and be grateful for all the blessings that do exist. But for others, especially me, this happens now. I believe it has to do with the arrival of Spring and the celebration of Easter. A season of new beginings. A fresh start if you will.

Growing up, my mom was big on "spring cleaning". The house had to be cleaned from top to bottom, corner to corner, wall to wall, inside-out, before Easter. Old, unwanted and unused items were thrown out and only the good, useful stuff was kept. Any one that knows me, knows that I definitely do not possess that cleaning streak. You'll be lucky if you can find a spot to sit on my sofa!

But I do like to complete a so-called "Spring Cleaning" on my life. I like to look back on the past year and reflect on the events that have occurred. There are good things, and then some things I'd like to erase from the pages of my so called life. The good things, I keep. I keep it in my memory box so I can recall it whenever I want and think back on it with fondness knowing that it will bring a smile to my face. The past year was definitely filled with AMAZING things - I gained independence, worked on being the person I once was (but older and hopefully wiser) but thought I could never be again, met some incredible people, re-connected with old friends, and had some wonderful experiences.

On the flip side, you have to take the bad with the good. So yes, there have been some bad things...and embarrasing things. PLENTY of embarrasing things. Things that could only happen to me becase my name is "Bincy T. Mathew". But I have faith that God knows what He’s doing with me. While I can't erase my past, I can come to grips with reality that it occurred, it's in the past, and while it does not define me, it IS a part of me. I'll allow myself to feel bad, wallow in a little self-pity, indulge in some Butter Pecan ice-cream (well ok, ALOT of Butter Pecan ice-cream), and then I'll "clean" it out of my life. It’ll be put away so that once Easter comes, there will be plenty of room for all the good that is anticipated to come to take its place. And it's guaranteed that Easter Sunday, after Mass, my spirits will be lifted and I will be ready to face another year of the good, the bad, and the not-so-pretty.


Thankfully, I am blessed with a wonderful, yet sometimes crazy (ya’ll know who are you are!), circle of friends who I can (and do) talk to at all hours of the night/morning, who keep my spirits up, give me words of encouragement, make me laugh till I cry (ahhh, memories!) or make me laugh out loud while I’m on the train (you guys DEFINITELY know who you are!!) or somewhere where strangers glance at me trying to determine if they need to keep their distance from me. I have friends that tell me what I NEED to hear, regardless of whether it is what I WANT to hear – a sign of TRUE friendship. And of course friends with whom I can say and do ANYTHING (again…memories!) without fear of judgment being passed. And for that, I thank you!

And while I don't know what God has planned for me this Spring, Summer, Fall, and Winter, I know I won't be disappointed.

I hope you too will do some “Spring Cleaning”…put away the bad, keep the good, and focus on a wonderful and blessed year ahead. On that note…I need to go clean out my fridge.

Until next time, love and be loved, and please disregard any nonsense you may have just read.

Love,
Bince :)